TV Tonight: Sons of Anarchy, Covert Affairs, New Girl, Moonshiners

What’s new tonight:
Sons of Anarchy (FX) Season Finale: It’s all going down tonight! Jax has to finish the gun deal with the Irish, keep Opie from trying to kill Clay again, keep himself from killing Clay, get Tara and the kids outta Charming, find Bobby and Juice, keep himself from killing Clay, etc.—a whole lotta drama to squeeze into an hour. Come to Brewvies (677 South 200 West, 21+) tonight at 8 and watch all said drama unfold on the big screen with a big beer or five. Beginning Tuesday, Jan. 17, True TV, City Weekly and Brewvies will present the next great FX drama, Justified, every Tuesday night—free, of course.

Covert Affairs (USA) Season Finale: Annie (the spy) and Danielle (the sister) take a nice vacation in Sweden—until Danielle is mistaken for a spy (?). Much running and frantic just-get-a-room-already phone calls to Auggie ensue.

New Girl (Fox) Jess asks her dude roommates for some advice for getting it on with her new “boyfriend” Paul (guest star Justin Long). In the real world, this advice would be filthy as hell and involve sex acts that would make even porn stars wince. In New Girl world, it’s just quirky and adorable (I am not using the word “adorkable” ever again).

Moonshiners (Discovery) Series Debut: Yes, even the cable channels once dedicated to science and academia are filling up with reality shows about rednecks doin’ redneck shit—as you may have guessed, Moonshiners is all about illegal hooch-makers runnin’ afoul of the law. Up next, stay tuned for Critter-Guttin’ and Incest Is Best.

Also new tonight:
Last Man Standing, Man Up, Body of Proof (ABC); A Michael Buble Christmas, The Biggest Loser (NBC); Glee, Raising Hope (Fox); 90210 (The CW); Eureka, Warehouse 13, Haven: Holiday Specials (Syfy); Mad Fashion (Bravo); Teen Mom 2, Chelsea Settles (MTV); Storage Wars, Storage Wars: Texas (A&E); Tori & Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood (Oxygen)

Looks to be another happily-ever-after ending for Sons of Anarchy tonight …

TV Tonight: New Girl, Body of Proof, Tosh.0, SOA

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

TV Tonight: Covert Affairs, New Girl, Ringer

What’s new tonight:
Covert Affairs (USA) Fall Premiere: When last we left CIA Annie (Piper Perabo), her sister (Anne Dudek) had finally figured out Annie’s secret job and kicked her ass out of the guest house—way to be a patriot, sis. Now, Annie’s looking for a new apartment and infiltrating a Basque separatist group that’s looking to blow shit up. Conveniently, her contact within the group is a hunky Spanish dude (cue “sexy time” music).

New Girl (Fox) Return: Fox’s biggest new fall hit is back after being forced off for a month due to baseball—think everybody still remembers and just loooves quirky Zooey Deschanel? Tonight, she laughs at her naked roommate, causing wackiness to ensue, and the New Black Guy brushes up all the pop culture he missed while in “Europe” (thus, more wackiness). Also, Childrens Hospital’s Lake Bell drops by—quirky/hot overload!

Ringer (The CW) Bridget (Sarah Michelle Gellar), as Siobhan (Sarah Michelle Gellar), reveals that she has a twin sister, Bridget (Sarah Michelle Gellar). Follow? And her BFF Gemma (not Sarah Michelle Gellar) is still missing and presumed dead. It’ll all make sense … eventually?

Sons of Anarchy (FX) Come watch it on the big screen tonight at Brewvies (677 South 200 West, 21+) at 8 pm, totally free. Fox Corp. and DirecTV have made nice, so the satellite plug won’t be pulled tonight and we won’t have to initiate Secret Plan B for the viewing. It was a solid plan, which may or may not have involved acting out SOA scenes with puppets.

Also new tonight:
Last Man Standing, Man Up, Dancing With the Stars, Body of Proof (ABC); NCIS, NCIS: Los Angeles, Unforgettable (CBS); The Biggest Loser, Parenthood (NBC); Glee, Raising Hope (Fox); 90210 (The CW); Tosh.0, Workaholics (Comedy Central); Mad Fashion (Bravo); Auction Hunters, Flip Men (Spike); True Life, I Used to Be Fat, Chelsea Settles (MTV); The Onion News Network (IFC)

Looks like it’s “sexy time” on Covert Affairs …

TV Tonight: Unforgettable, New Girl, Sons of Anarchy

What’s new tonight:
Unforgettable (CBS) Now we see if the second episode of the cop-adjacent show formerly known as The Rememberer lives up to the promise of the first—since the first wasn’t all that great, the bar ain’t high. On tonight’s Unforgettable, ex-cop-turned-tank-top-wearing-consultant Carrie Wells (Poppy Montgomery) helps a young boy recall the details of a murder he witnessed—which brings up her own painful memories of her sister’s death. But, if Carrie remembers everything she’s ever experienced, anyway, shouldn’t she be over it by now? This show is way complex …

New Girl (Fox) Since Damon Wayans Jr. nor anyone else expected ABC’s Happy Endings to get a second season (which kicks off tomorrow night), he shot last week’s pilot of New Girl. So tonight, Zooey Deschanel and the two other dudes get a new black roommate! It’s gonna be awkward yet adorable!

Sons of Anarchy (FX) In tonight’s ep, SAMCRO (Sons of Anarchy Motorcycle Club Redwood Original) meets up with SAMTAZ, a Tucson chapter—are you going to argue over the missing “C”? Didn’t think so. As always, you can come to Brewvies (677 South 200 West, 21+) tonight and watch Sons of Anarchy on the big screen (in HD!) with a big beer (in mugs!), totally free at 8 pm.

Also new tonight:
NCIS, NCIS: Los Angeles (CBS); Glee, Raising Hope (Fox); The Biggest Loser, Parenthood (NBC); Dancing With the Stars, Body of Proof (ABC); 90210, Ringer (The CW); Tosh.0, Workaholics (Comedy Central); The Rachel Zoe Project (Bravo); Teen Mom, Awkward (MTV); Web Therapy (Showtime)

The shit’s going down on Sons of Anarchy—you know, as usual …