TV Tonight: Big Bang Theory, Archer, Unsupervised

What’s new tonight:
The Big Bang Theory (CBS) 100th Episode: What a momentous occasion! BBT must have something really special in store for this episode, right? A cool, unexpected twist for all the fans? Says here, “Leonard asks Penny out to dinner.” Fascinating.

Archer, Unsupervised (FX) Season Premiere, Series Debut: Read all about it at CityWeekly.net (Item 1).

When Girls Kill (E!) Special: E! goes all Dateline with the stories of four murderous teenage girls locked away for life—or, as they put it, “From the schoolyard to the prison yard.” Hey, at least it doesn’t involve any Kardashians.

Also new tonight:
Wipeout, Grey’s Anatomy, Private Practice (ABC); Rob, Person of Interest, The Mentalist (CBS); 30 Rock, Parks & Recreation, The Office, Up All Night, The Firm (NBC); American Idol, The Finder (Fox); The Vampire Diaries, The Secret Circle (The CW); The Real Housewives of Atlanta (Bravo); Project Runway All-Stars (Lifetime); American Stuffers (Animal Planet); Funny or Die’s Billy on the Street (Fuse); Jersey Shore (MTV)

More on that shocking, never-before-seen development on The Big Bang Theory: 

TV Tonight: How to Be a Gentleman, Private Practice, Sunny, Archer

* New True TV featuring Dexter, Homeland, Hung and American Horror Story up now at CityWeekly.net.

What’s new tonight:
How to Be a Gentleman (CBS) Series Debut: Johnny Drama from Entourage (Kevin Dillon) and Cricket from It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia (David Hornsby, or Mr. Emily Deschanel) star in an odd-couple sitcom about a macho slob and a prim snob who learn Valuable Life Lessons from each other—like, how it’s a good idea to have a movie and a cable comedy to fall back on when this crapfest is cancelled. If nothing else, How to Be a Gentleman will take some of that (undeserved) Worst New Sitcom heat off of Whitney.

Private Practice (ABC) Season Premiere: If there are any ABC viewers left after Charlie’s Angels tonight, they’ll get to see Dr. Addison (Kate Walsh) putting the baby-maker moves on Benjamin Bratt. Your mom will enjoy that; Benjamin Bratt, well, it’s a paycheck.

It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia (FX) The gang attempts to out-creep Toddlers & Tiaras tonight with “Frank’s Little Beauties,” a children’s pageant gone horribly, horribly wrong. So it’ll probably be picked up for a full season by TLC within the hour.

Archer (FX) Mini-Season Finale: The “Heart of Archness” trilogy comes to an end to make way for the return of The League next week—relax, Archer will return with a real season early 2012. Will Archer’s reign as a pirate king-turned-prisoner of war conclude without dismemberment or death? Sure, if Mallory pays the ransom … oh, shit.

Also new tonight:
Charlie’s Angels, Grey’s Anatomy (ABC); The Big Bang Theory, Person of Interest, The Mentalist (CBS); Community, Parks & Recreation, The Office, Whitney, Prime Suspect (NBC); The X Factor (Fox); The Vampire Diaries, The Secret Circle (The CW); Project Runway, Dance Moms, Russian Dolls (Lifetime); Millionaire Matchmaker (Bravo); NTSF:SD:SUV (Adult Swim); Jersey Shore (MTV)

How to Be a Gentleman is a comedy—no, really:

TV Tonight: Vampire Diaries, Secret Circle, Sunny, Archer

 What’s new tonight:
The Vampire Diaries (The CW) Season Premiere: Being over 14 and the owner of a penis, I really have no idea what’s been going on with TVD over the past two seasons, but I do know this: It can’t possibly be any more ridiculous than what’s been going on over at True Blood … right? Sez The CW about Season 3 opener “The Birthday”: “On the morning of Elena's (Nina Dobrev) 18th birthday, Caroline (Candice Accola) is busy planning a party, but Elena is focused on searching for any clues that might help her discover where Stefan (Paul Wesley) is. Damon (Ian Somerhalder) is also searching for Stefan, while trying to protect Elena and keep her from doing anything that would draw Klaus' (Joseph Morgan) attention. Meanwhile, Klaus and Stefan are busy trailing a werewolf named Ray Sutton (guest star David Gallagher, Super 8). Now working at the Mystic Grill along with Matt (Zach Roerig), Jeremy (Steven R. McQueen) is struggling to understand why he keeps seeing the ghosts of Vicki (guest star Kayla Ewell) and Anna (guest star Malese Jow) since he was brought back to life by Bonnie's (Kat Graham) magic. Meanwhile, Alaric (Matt Davis) does his best to watch over Elena and Jeremy, while dealing with his grief over Jenna's death. Finally, Caroline and Tyler (Michael Trevino) face a new and unexpected challenge.” Whew. You got served, Bon Temps.

The Secret Circle (The CW) Series Debut: Read about it at CityWeekly.net (Item 2).

It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia (FX) Season Premiere: Read about it at CityWeekly.net (Item 1).

Archer (FX) Mini-Season Premiere: This “special assignment” run is only for three weeks, as The League returns on Oct. 6; Archer’s third season premieres for real early 2012. In the “Heart of Archness” trilogy, Archer (H. Jon Benjamin) is hiding out in the South Pacific after the murder of his fiancée at the end of last season—and then, naturally, he becomes a pirate king. Guest voices: Patrick Warburton and David Cross.

CMT Made: Roller Derby (CMT) Derby Alert: A divorcee single mom joins Colorado’s Rocky Mountain Rollergirls to “get her life together.” Because roller-derby girls are just models of stability.

Also new tonight:
Wipeout (season finale, ABC); Project Runway, Dance Moms, Russian Dolls (Lifetime); Impact Wrestling (Spike); Jersey Shore (MTV)

An Archer crossover with It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia? Dare to dream …