TV Tonight: Fringe, Grimm, Portlandia, Real Time

What’s new tonight:
Fringe (Fox) Return: Watch it real hard, Fringers—this is likely the final season for the only true sci-fi series on network TV. Tonight, Peter travels to that Other Universe for a showdown with Walternate, and Olivia gets some troubling information from an Observer. See? The show’s not that hard to follow.

Grimm (NBC) Return: When a hyper-strong criminal literally breaks out of prison and sets out for revenge against those who locked him up, Nick (super)naturally assumes the guy must by one of them fairytale monsters. Hint: The episode is titled “Game Ogre.”

Portlandia (IFC) The Battlestar Galactica Episode: Meanwhile, on the non-monster-infested side of Portland, Fred and Carrie become obsessed with Battlestar Galactica to the point that they have to create their own fan-fiction sequel to the canceled series, and you won’t believe the guest stars they enlist to help. Well, you probably would, actually—seen Gaius Baltar in anything lately?

Real Time With Bill Maher (HBO) Season Premiere: In the Season 10 (!) opener, Bill welcomes commentator David Frum, director Rob Reiner, Florida Rep. Debbie Wasserman Schultz, documentary filmmaker/writer Alexandra Pelosi and former GOP presidential candidate/pizza magnate Herman Cain, whom Bill has mocked quite extensively. Should go fine.

Extreme Makeover: Home Edition (ABC) Series Finale: Canceled! Pack up the bullhorn, Pennington! What? It’ll be back as a series of specials? Fuck …

Also new tonight:
Chuck (NBC); A Gifted Man, CSI:NY, Blue Bloods (CBS); Kitchen Nightmares (fox); Nikita, Supernatural (The CW); Star Wars: The Clone Wars (Cartoon Network); Merlin (Syfy); The Increasingly Poor Decisions of Todd Margaret (IFC); The Life & Times of Tim (HBO)

Even if you’re up on Fringe, this probably won’t tell you a damned thing:

TV Tonight: The League, Community, Wipeout, Grimm

What’s new tonight:
The League (FX) Dushku Alert: Kevin thinks his hot Krav Maga instructor (hot Eliza Dushku) is hitting on him. So, conundrum: We’re to believe that anyone in The League is taking Krav Maga classes AND the remote possibility of Eliza Dushku hitting on them? Jenny, sure—but Kevin? Just roll with it.

Community (NBC) Last Episode Before “Hiatus”: It’s a combo Christmas episode and let’s-piss-on-Glee episode! God bless us, every one! Thanks, Community gang! See you next … Spring? Summer? Never? Damn …

Winter Wipeout: Deck the Balls (ABC) Christmas (?) Special: Meanwhile, in quality TV programming that actually gets viewers: A full hour of fat dummies getting knocked around by giant rubber dildos! For the holidays!

Grimm (NBC) New Episode, Special Night: A dozen of you might notice that is where Prime Suspect usually airs—tonight, however, it’s a bonus ep of Friday-night semi-hit Grimm, aka Law & Order: GFT (Grimm’s Fairy Tales). Check it out; it’s at least as crime-y as The Mentalist.

Also new tonight: 
America’s Funniest Home Videos, The Great Big American Auction (ABC); The Big Bang Theory, Rules of Engagement, Person of Interest, The Mentalist (ABC); Parks & Recreation, The Office, Whitney (NBC); The X Factor, Bones (Fox); Weed Wars (Discovery); DUI (TLC); Project Accessory (Lifetime); It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia (FX); Beavis & Butt-head, Good Vibes (MTV); Burn Notice (USA); Gigolos, Dave’s Old Porn (Showtime)

Kevin gets a face/pants full of Dushku on The League tonight:

TV Weekend: Onion News, Grimm, Weirdo, AMAs

What’s new this weekend:
The Onion News Network (IFC, tonight) ONN is back on Friday nights, and anchor Brooke Alvarez is back from the Tired Hospital—just in time for The Fact Zone’s investigative series “Sex In America,” which is more than just a cheap ploy for ratings. But not much more. Welcome back, Brooke!

Grimm (NBC, tonight) It ain’t bad, but could Grimm be made better? Yes! Read how at CityWeekly.net (Item 1).

Also new tonight:
Extreme Makeover: Home Edition (ABC); A Gifted Man, CSI:NY, Blue Bloods (CBS); Chuck (NBC); Kitchen Nightmares, Fringe (Fox); Nikita, Supernatural (The CW); Women Who Rock (PBS); Star Wars: The Clone Wars, ThunderCats (Cartoon Network); Sanctuary (Syfy); The Soup (E!); Boss (Starz)

Donald Glover: Weirdo (Comedy Central, Saturday) It’s a stand-up special with Troy from Community—which is not canceled … yet.

Also new Saturday:
Saturday Night Live: Jason Segal w/ Florence & The Machine (NBC/CW30); Cops (Fox); Primevil, Graham Norton Show (BBC America)

2011 American Music Awards (ABC, Sunday) Every horrible, talentless musical act on the charts together in one place, including Justin Bieber, Katy Perry, Marc Anthony, Christina Aguilera, Chris Brown, LMFAO and Nicki Minaj. Am I suggesting nuking the venue and instantly improving the country’s musical outlook? No, not at all. But you could gather some tips from …

Homeland (Showtime, Sunday) The home-soil terrorism drama is damned good, but could it be made even better? Yes! Read how at CityWeekly.net (Item 2).

The Walking Dead (AMC, Sunday) Come watch it at Brewvies (677 South 200 West, 21+) for free at 7 pm—only one more episode to go before the winter break, zombie enthusiasts.

Also new Sunday:
The Amazing Race, The Good Wife, CSI: Miami (CBS); The Simpsons, Allen Gregory, Family Guy, American Dad (Fox); Sister Wives (TLC); Kendra (E!); Robot Chicken, Squidbillies, China Il. (Adult Swim); The Real Housewives of Atlanta (Bravo); Hell on Wheels, Talking Dead (AMC); Boardwalk Empire, Hung, How to Make It in America (HBO); Dexter (Showtime)

The next Walking Dead, which you should be watching at Brewvies:

TV Weekend: Fringe, SNL, Hell on Wheels, Heart She Holler

What’s new this weekend:
Fringe (Fox, tonight) Not only is Fringe finally back after way too many baseball interruptions, but The Artist Formerly Known as Peter (Joshua Jackson) returns, too! Unfortunately, so do those translucent shapeshifters, fringe science’s answer to hairless cats (blech). Fringe is still the only real sci-fi show on the network TV, and possibly the smartest ever created—so let’s see how far the ratings will drop this week.



Grimm (NBC, tonight) Week 2: It premiered well last Friday (even against the World Series), but now Law & Order: Special Grimm Unit faces the aforementioned Fringe, as well as The CW’s Supernatural. This week’s secret weapon? Thievin’ bears. Yes, really.

Also new tonight:
Extreme Makeover: Home Edition (ABC); A Gifted Man, CSI:NY, Blue Bloods (CBS); Chuck (NBC); Kitchen Nightmares (Fox); Nikita, Supernatural (The CW); Star Wars: The Clone Wars (Cartoon Network); Sanctuary (Syfy); Real Time With Bill Maher (HBO); The Soup (E!)

Saturday Night Live (NBC/CW30, Saturday) The good news: It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia’s Charlie Day hosts SNL! The bad news: The musical guests are limp-dick AOR “rockers” Maroon 5. Can’t have everything.



Also new Saturday:
Cops (Fox); Blue Mountain State (Spike); True Life: I’m Occupying Wall Street (MTV); Pablo Francisco: They Put it Out There (Comedy Central); Wendy Lieberman: Taller on TV (Showtime)

Dexter (Showtime, Sunday) Will Brother Sam (Mos Def, or whatever he’s calling himself this week) survive being gunned down at the end of last Sunday’s ep? Yeah, probably—the only real question here is, how swift will Dexter’s (Michael C. Hall) vengeance be? And should he really be taking on new pals? We’ve seen before what happens when Dex makes friends, and it never ends well. Oh, and there’s some Deb/Quinn drama … what-ever.



The Walking Dead (AMC, Sunday) Come watch it at Brewvies (677 South 200 West, 21+) for free at 8 pm; zombies are better 10-feet-tall in HD with a beer and nachos.

Hell on Wheels (AMC, Sunday) Series Debut: Read about it at CityWeekly.net (Item 1).

The Heart, She Holler (Adult Swim, Sunday) Miniseries Debut: Read about it at CityWeekly.net (Item 4).

Also new Sunday:
Once Upon a Time, Desperate Housewives, Pan Am (ABC); The Amazing Race, The Good Wife, CSI: Miami (CBS); The Simpsons, Allen Gregory, Family Guy, American Dad (Fox); Sister Wives (TLC); Kendra, Dirty Soap (E!); Robot Chicken, Squidbillies, China Il. (Adult Swim); The Real Housewives of Atlanta (Bravo); Boardwalk Empire, Hung, How to Make It in America (HBO); Homeland (Showtime); Talking Dead (AMC)

TV Weekend: Grimm, Zombie Apocalypse, Allen Gregory

What’s new this weekend:
Chuck, Grimm (NBC, tonight) Season Premiere/Series Debut: Read all about ‘em at CityWeekly.net (Item 2).

Also new tonight:
Some Baseball Shit (Fox); Extreme Makeover: Home Edition (ABC); Nikita, Supernatural (The CW); Star Wars: The Clone Wars (Cartoon Network); Sanctuary (Syfy); Real Time With Bill Maher (HBO); The Soup (E!)

Zombie Apocalypse (Syfy, Saturday) Movie: Read all about it at CityWeekly.net (Item 3).

Also new Saturday:
Cops, America’s Most Wanted (Fox); Possessing Piper Rose (Lifetime); The Good Witch’s Family (Hallmark); Dogs 101, Puppies vs. Babies (Animal Planet)

Allen Gregory (Fox, Sunday) Series Debut: Read all about it at CityWeekly.net (Item 4).

The Walking Dead (AMC, Sunday) Come watch it at Brewvies (677 South 200 West, 21+) for free at 8 pm, after some Geek Show Halloween madness.

Also new Sunday:
Once Upon a Time, Desperate Housewives, Pan Am (ABC); The Amazing Race, The Good Wife, CSI: Miami (CBS); Sister Wives (TLC); Kendra, Dirty Soap (E!); Robot Chicken, Squidbillies, China Il. (Adult Swim); Boardwalk Empire, Hung, How to Make It in America (HBO); Dexter, Homeland (Showtime); Talking Dead (AMC)

Still looking for that damned kid on The Walking Dead this Sunday …